A new view...

A new view…

In the blessing I received from my nephew I was told to work on feeling confidence in myself and to look for the good in my life. I’m seeing how those go together.

I feel more and more separation at work. I don’t feel like I can trust many of the people I work with. I hear them talking about others and guess they are also talking about me. What was a team feels fractured. When I’ve felt attacked and unsafe my pattern has been to talk about others, let them fail, feel smug when they get called out. This is a part of me I’m not proud of, in fact as I write that I realize how much shame I feel for that pattern which is what is keeping it so alive. I get to see and love the little girl who felt the only way she could be safe was to build up walls and put others down before they pulled her down. I get to hold her in compassion and allow her to feel betrayed and unloved and worthless.

As I prepare to go to work today I get to ask some trusted co-workers to help me stop gossiping, to call me out if I talk badly about anyone (no matter how frustrated I feel at the favoritism there). I get to look to Him and remember that He is all I need. I don’t need to be seen by management or co-workers when I am seen by my Savior.

Much love,

Jules ❤